stalking
To follow or observe (a person) persistently, especially out of obsession or derangement.
I'm not sure I like the idea of this blog so much any more. Probably not enough to stop me, but certainly enough to give me pause. I mean, I look at the site logs regularly and I see all these returning visitors. A constant relatively anonymous audiences. Sure, I can place some of them, hits from students at Columbia, hits from UChicago terminals, hits from various local Hyde Park broadband providers, but I can't ever be sure who's who.
And they're typically back, day after day. But what kind of bothers me more is the way I'm positioned myself. Not only do I obsessively check who's reading me, but I'm simultaneously keeping up on the lives of people who are still very much strangers to me. I don't want to become some deranged stalker, but I feel like I'm already half way there. Though, to be fair, it's not the deranged half, just the persistent observation half. I believe that, at least.
I guess it is sort of a game, where I talk about myself, and in return I get a couple things. I get people asking me about things in my life they might not otherwise have any sort of access to, which is often good, though not always. Moreover, I occasionally get, in a sort of exchange, though not really, to read about these other people, and do the same. But there are some people, who I know, or at the very least strongly suspect of reading, but who never say anything, and don't make anything about themselves available.
It makes me think about the way livejournal has "friends" and extremely simple access control methods centered around this notion of friends. I think I'm going to start investigating migrating this blog off of blogspot and onto some hosting of my own, in the interest of restricting access a little. I hear good things about a number of free alternatives to Blogger. This is one of those plans I will probably forget about until one weekend when I'm really bored, and get a half-assed start to, and then promptly abandon forever after. Maybe I'll just change the address and only tell a few people, then watch who else starts visiting and see if I can guess the... leaks. I really do like "pantsfarm" though.
I'm not sure I like the idea of this blog so much any more. Probably not enough to stop me, but certainly enough to give me pause. I mean, I look at the site logs regularly and I see all these returning visitors. A constant relatively anonymous audiences. Sure, I can place some of them, hits from students at Columbia, hits from UChicago terminals, hits from various local Hyde Park broadband providers, but I can't ever be sure who's who.
And they're typically back, day after day. But what kind of bothers me more is the way I'm positioned myself. Not only do I obsessively check who's reading me, but I'm simultaneously keeping up on the lives of people who are still very much strangers to me. I don't want to become some deranged stalker, but I feel like I'm already half way there. Though, to be fair, it's not the deranged half, just the persistent observation half. I believe that, at least.
I guess it is sort of a game, where I talk about myself, and in return I get a couple things. I get people asking me about things in my life they might not otherwise have any sort of access to, which is often good, though not always. Moreover, I occasionally get, in a sort of exchange, though not really, to read about these other people, and do the same. But there are some people, who I know, or at the very least strongly suspect of reading, but who never say anything, and don't make anything about themselves available.
It makes me think about the way livejournal has "friends" and extremely simple access control methods centered around this notion of friends. I think I'm going to start investigating migrating this blog off of blogspot and onto some hosting of my own, in the interest of restricting access a little. I hear good things about a number of free alternatives to Blogger. This is one of those plans I will probably forget about until one weekend when I'm really bored, and get a half-assed start to, and then promptly abandon forever after. Maybe I'll just change the address and only tell a few people, then watch who else starts visiting and see if I can guess the... leaks. I really do like "pantsfarm" though.
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